Success is a very powerful word but how do you actually measure it? Is it about having a great professional career? Maybe how much money you make? Did you manage to buy a house? Get married? Have kids and settle down? So many of this stories feel like perpetual repetition that many times just do not really add up.
Honestly, I do not personally think so. You can choose many paths in life, but the first fundamental step towards this supposed “success” should be to, at the very least, choose a path that makes YOU happy, over so many others that make people around you happy. From your parents, to your spouse and even your children, they all have their own paths to choose. Dragging your tired self every day to a job you do not like, even if you make lots of money, is not what success should look like.
I feel like I am successful when I wake up in the morning and see my son’s smiling face staring back at me, when I hear him laugh, when I see him dance (boy, does he like dancing!). I feel not only successful but also deeply blessed when we go on a family walk any given Sunday, when we stay home and make some popcorn to watch a movie. It is the most “normal” things that I never ever take for granted.
Here is another question: Is success tied to productivity? Moreover, if it is, what does it mean to be productive? I use to give myself a hard time all those days I thought “I wasn’t doing enough”. Then, I realized being a mother and devoting all my energy to caring for this new life the first few years was definitely not only enough, but quite a lot! A 9 to 5 job will never be as exhausting, and if you are a parent, you know I am right.
If your offspring happens to attend daycare or full on school, is it productive to give yourself days for self-care? Most definitely yes! You are entitled to go to that yoga class you love, to get a massage or simply go out for coffee with friends. You are successful and productive every time you give yourself space and freedom to rest (guilt-free, of course). Because, after all, your children need you to be happy and recharged in order to be the kind of parent they need you to be.
Even though it has taken me some time to reach this conclusion, now I know my greatest success is to live happy and enjoy the family I have built. Other types of success may also come, sure! I am very open to them, but the main thing is that I have learnt to stop underestimating all the hard work I do, even if it does not come from a payroll.
